The first step to successful negotiations
Try to overcome your personal dislike of the opponent. And you don't have to like it at all. Just understand that this is how the world works. Do not confuse negotiation with terror or attacking the other. To negotiate is to play the emotional game on which the whole society is built. It is entirely possible for a person to get what they want. He just needs to know how to ask for it the right way. So accept negotiation as a part of life. And learn to use your emotions, instincts, and insights to connect with your opponent on a deeper level. Because this relationship will help you affect them emotionally. Effective negotiation is a psychological advantage. If you know how to affect the opponent emotionally and on his judgment, you will eventually get your way. A successful negotiator must get everything he wants without giving anything of value in return. And to do this in such a way that the opponent is left with the impression that they are on excellent terms. A successful negotiator masters emotional intelligence to perfection. Able to listen actively and feel the way of expression of the other.
Животът – поредица от преговори – част 3
There are two types of negotiators - good and great
The former know to expect all sorts of surprises. And the latter strive to reveal these surprises with the help of their skills. The negotiator must arm himself with many hypotheses. What is the situation, the demands of the other side and many more unknowns. Then, based on the information available to him, he concentrates on the situation itself. This is done in order to weed out any false hypotheses. This process should be approached with the mindset of a discoverer. In a crisis situation, any new information or insight is a step forward. And it's here, at this point, that some really smart people get stuck. Because they make the mistake of thinking that they already know everything and there is nothing more to discover. And the main goal is to collect the most information about everything.
Here the main mistake that is made is that people stick more easily to their own beliefs. Based on hearsay or personal prejudices, the average person tends to jump to conclusions. Personal intuitions are also often neglected, which is also a mistake. All these preconceptions distort our perceptions of the world and we end up with a wrong picture of the situation we are in.
The main mistakes we make when negotiating
A massive mistake of negotiators is that they almost start negotiations starting from their personal arguments and position and do not listen to the other side at all. Negotiation is not a battle of arguments. Most people talk only about their personal position, and when they are silent, they think only about it. The other side usually does the same. The negotiations are not going well and both sides are in a kind of schizophrenic state. Everyone listens only to themselves.
To break out of this vicious circle, with one action you can tame yourself and the opponent. Just listen to what he is saying and try to understand him. In this way, you will soon disarm the opponent, because he, realizing that you are listening to him, will feel safe. And finally you will silence his inner voice. The goal here is to find out what the other party actually needs and wants. Put yourself in your opponent's shoes. You don't need to agree with him. As long as he feels that you recognize his situation. But even if you understand the other person's needs and wants, this is still not your starting point for solving the situation. The key for the negotiator is to show respect for the opponent's emotions and build enough trust for the real conversation to begin.
© 2023 Iliana Dechkova